One day someone said to me my eyes were beautiful. I couldn’t see why. When I washed my face every morning and every night, I dared not to look in the mirror at my eyes. I couldn’t look myself in the face. The truth was within me, however I turned away. Avoiding what I would see if I looked in my own eyes.
Someone told me that my eyes were big, round, almost moon like, but beautiful. Cascading dark brown reflections of pain, gifts, loss, and wanting to find happiness. I was being read. That person was listening to me speak. Staring at my eyes, they told me what I was thinking. I was afraid of something and it might have been of myself.
When someone told me that look in my eyes showed rejection, insecurity, and the need of someone to trust. I felt vulnerable, like a baby bird, I was pushed out of a nest, not being taught how to fly. I had my hands up, nobody came to help me. Falling at different speeds I tried to prepare myself for the collisions that were about to take place. I was blinded, I felt like a hawk just came down and swept me up and held me prisoner for it’s own nest.
Someone looked into my eyes and told me to dream, my visions are protected by my own strengths and instinct. Somehow I felt like I couldn’t find it. There was no hand up for me, opportunity has turned it’s back.
My eyes became like a window, marked with unlimited fingerprints, blurred vision dominated my every thought of who I was supposed to be. My eyes became a movie for no one to see.
One day I accidentally looked in the mirror, I saw something that I’ve never seen before … I saw me for the first time. I looked into my eyes because I wanted to see what somebody else saw. It was an awakening, I felt as if God forced me to look. I think stood in that mirror until my feet went numb. For the first time in my life, I found that my eyes were beautiful. Brown, sensitive, and glowing. It was like looking at the moon knowing it’s craters tell a story. I love my eyes, I love what I see, and I’m glad that somebody told me …
My pen is a magic carpet. It takes me where ever I want to go. A place defining every dream any feeling that will flow. Windows open, a breeze whispers softly, red robins flying from tree to tree. I use my pen creating words of harmony. I love my pen.
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A lil bored so i decided to share a song I’m about to finish writing with y’all. Hope you like it if you don’t then maybe you’ll like the next one. ;-))
-Dash Miller Says
(Source: Dashmillersays, via dashmillersays)
When I was a little girl, it was instilled in me that I was a warrior. A warrior in my own female right. I was taught to be strong and smart … Keep my head up when I was feeling torn and keep on moving and don’t let anyone stop me…….
When I met him, I was intimidated and emotionally stripped… I thought it was the right thing to do to surrender myself to what I thought was the best thing for me … love …
That love took me for a bodacious ride, an uncompromisable turn. I thought I wasn’t supposed to be free. The gestures that were rained upon me, chained me like an iron fence. Whipped with the lashes of an emotional burn … scarred…
The vision of clothes being torn off were the words of unforbidden truth, I honored it and made excuses for it. In turn I got subdued into a force of something that I thought stripped me from being proud. It escalated to something more …
My emotional stance was not allowed to cry, not allowed to be … anything other than myself. Quiet I stayed humble and agreed to every aching pain. I agreed to the substance that I allowed myself to accept. I begged in my own mind for it to stop … it didn’t. I thought it was right.
The breakdown that I was afraid of, I did not let my children see. The strength that it took for me to hold it all in … made me tired. The breakdown that crept up on me every moment I had alone was paused at the result of me believing I would be labeled weak and worthless to any man … or even myself.
I believed that it was okay to keep it all in and forfeit what was really healing. In my own mind… I was afraid of this breakdown. The tears and the pain that would make my body shiver when my lips quivered.
Brand new, I don’t want to carry this baggage. This beginning, this new love … I want to be free. You’re showing me you, and I am afraid to show you me. This powerful breakdown that lurks upon me, has got me bitting my nails, because I know you’re the type of person that will hold me … especially when I cry.
This breakdown had a grip on me and I’m so afraid of it.
There are decsions that are made to become permanent. We know when we need to wake up in the morning, eat a meal, and pay a bill. These are made by way of life … consistent … successful. Using thing to move forward, looking back is not an option.
An escalator ride is an option, a walk in the park is an option … breathing isn’t … mandatory … nonevasive.
Choosing those in life is an option … multiple … undecided. taking on challenges for pleasure and use of time has its downfalls. Taking advantage of what option comes before something good can change in an instant.
Games are an option … planned … unconscientiously. Things are done without regard to what’s relevant to another. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure it out. A game of chance, challenge, and hidden agenda is unrepairable … loss … start over.
A person is not an option when it is convenient, easy, and you don’t have to go out of your way. Involvement of an option mean committment can mean anything. Options are owed any promises … nieve … open-hearted.
The life of an option is short term, not with extensive meaning… unvaluable to some. An option can be put to the side, or be called upon when needed. An option is the social appearance of giving … showing.
The life of an option is limited to benefiting truth and honest speaking. There are considerate veils to be uncovered … honor … respect … is not given to an option. Availability will run out, options will fail … and consistencies will subside and then it will be a question mark… “Where are my options?”
The answer will be “It just simply ran out ” … The Life of my options were giving whole heartedly and unselfishly … what about you. Still seeking … still doing … however, not applying your options has led to the disappearance of a good option.
My Friend has character and rest, meaning the tempt to judge is not there.
Tender ears has got me surrounded… the answer I needed was soft and without hurt. I longed for the moment that could be heard, and allowed to speak with full emotion.
My friend has room for sweet hugs and comfort, the ability to offer understanding. The calm reassures my confidence to confide. I respect my friend for the loyalty within and the guided security of my spirit.
My friend looks in to my eyes with trusting honor and a moving heart. The smile that keeps me, sends me into a deep exhale. I need this, I feel this and I admire the character that defines what My Friend really means to me.
My Friend is there when I cry and the tears fall steadily, reaching out cupped hands to catch its every drop. Touching my face and raising my chin, to support the uplift that I require. Holding me when my soul is bare and when I can’t seem to stand. It’s a blessed feeling to know I will always have that hand.
My Friend is gift, given to me. Promises I will keep, memories to build, an everlasting part that will never be taken for granted. Thank you for Being MY FRIEND …
Am I on your mind like the time of day… whenever you smell the sweet scent of a rose. The desire of a flame on a lit candle dancing so cautiously… exposing a silhouette of passion in the dark… makes me feel the passionate song that you sing.
Am I on your mind deep in the corners as the soft breeze whispers a melody in your ear. The fragrance of your colonge melts me with ease. I close my eyes and dream of you touching me … feeling the energy like you are already here.
Am I on your mind like a ship sailing by on a calm day… the clouds in a hurry making way for the stars. Coastal barriers providing a support for the burst of waves that lean towards everything …
Am I on your mind like a sweet fruit … temptation and lust provides the moment with ultimate pleasure. Making a way for you to keep me forever … Am I on your mind ?
I thought I lost my way. I thought I had no way of showing you anything. Perfectly you stand before me, reminding me of the beauty on the outside and within. Scarred from the revelences past, emotional from insecurity’s glare, looking in my eyes what do you see? Not wanting to lose what you are showing me, I will advance to perch high upon your heart. Divine intervention recreated my reinvention. You gather me up and dust me off like a pearl you found in the sand. Uncovered I glisten with your hands, holding me up to the stars. Tightly your grasp close to your soul and never letting me go. Aware of being brand new, a light has shown something bright, because you said that you love me too. The strength of your arms and the sweet of your breath, has conquered what spirit I had left. The warmth of your hands cascading my body, the smooth of lips, has began to endure me. Reinventing my loathes has led me to you. I feel like I don’t know what to do, reinventing myself lets me know I need you. Touching my face and caressing my thighs, as the tears roll down my face, you reach to wipe my eyes. Intimate whispers has blown in my ear, I long for another day so you can hold me near. Grateful and humble to be in your presence, God has brought you to my attention, your voice in song and manly honor, has reinvented my … you with no resistance.
I imagine a rush of a downward coast, when you held my hand for the first time. You lead me in your path of a different kind. Pulling me close … an unexpected churn touched within me. Like a dance slow and surreal, I closed my eyes and enveloped. As you looked in to my eyes, I felt an unfamiliar strength a feeling you send to me. The breeze was around us, the birds sang, the trees whispered something so gently. Noticing my intuition, you gave way to my thoughts that lead me to know you have the infinite power. My mind spent as you led me on this passionate lean, I felt light and free. I felt like I could breathe more easily. I didn’t feel that I could insist on this spin of what we know … love is it? Is it too soon? The power you have over me, this dance, this place… it’s what I need. You open the door to intimate gesture, in a leading way, is it okay that I succumb? You found me, you danced and I danced. The layout is clear … you have the infinite power.
I imagine a rush of a downward coast, when you held my hand for the first time. You lead me in your path of a different kind. Pulling me close … an unexpected churn touched within me. Like a dance slow and surreal, I closed my eyes and enveloped. As you looked in to my eyes, I felt an unfamiliar strength a feeling you send to me. The breeze was around us, the birds sang, the trees whispered something so gently. Noticing my intuition, you gave way to my thoughts that lead me to know you have the infinite power. My mind spent as you led me on this passionate lean, I felt light and free. I felt like I could breathe more easily. I didn’t feel that I could insist on this spin of what we know … love is it? Is it too soon? The power you have over me, this dance, this place… it’s what I need. You open the door to intimate gesture, in a leading way, is it okay that I succumb? You found me, you danced and I danced. The layout is clear … you have the infinite power.
Where are you … That essence of coloigne that I dream of smelling. The constant passes of couples holding hands or kissing in front of their dwelling. Where are the signs that you are on your way ? Constantly checking my phone to make sure its working … Oh I forgot, I didn’t give out my number today !
I don’t know if you are a gift to me. I don’t believe in meeting by mistake … There might be a possibility that God placed a button in front of me to see if I would press it. The conversations that we have are incredible, very personal. I appreciate the honesty of your life that you confide in me. Spontaneously … You guide my emotions in to an attachment spin. Many lessons I’ve learned … Don’t make the same mistakes twice. Am I learning ? I don’t know … The smell that has gravitational pull has a scent of a rose …powdery and silk… Deep color of intutition smells like rain. Or… Is it the scent of stale piss that seeps a sneaky breeze towards me when I walk down a dark street deep in my own thoughts ? Garbage that has rot and crooked growth… That has set in its own ravages for too long ?
